My Journey

My journey of healing is difficult,
I have diligently trod the path,
Terrifying shadows have awaited me,
Some watched while others drew me back.

I've found truths beneath the rubble,
Of what it takes for a small child to cope,
When she knew no foundation or boundaries,
No power, no love, or no hope.

So many people used and abused her,
Because she knew no other way,
Her mind helped by burying her feelings,
So in emptiness, she survived each day.

But old patterns and lessons don't die,
They lie dormant until such a time,
When triggered by a different abuser,
These skills are waiting and well primed.

This all happens in the flash of a second,
Adult powers and boundaries surcease,
I was trapped in a hopeless circle,
A ready victim for further abuse.

I'm proud of the young girl's survival,
But I'm frightened for the adult she became,
My tears are unshed, my emotions are dead,
I'm alone, and I matter to none.

10/28/97

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